Friday, December 21, 2012
In this timezone, it’s the 21st of December already, and the world has been destroyed.
Sorry guys, but the Mayans were right. At 12:01 am, Eastern Australian Daylight time, this section of the world was destroyed. The planet is disintegrating along the time-zone lines like the segments of an orange getting peeled off and tossed into a juicer. Sorry folks, it’s all over. And they didn’t even use my method for destroying the planet.
Fortunately, the super expensive Australian National Broadband Network is extensive and robust enough to survive this catastrophe, so I am still able to blog from the cosmic void. It is getting cold and hard to breathe out here, but there are some benefits. For example, without a globe there is no global warming. And, in space, no-one can hear your neighbor throw up in the front lawn after a big night out. And the big night will last forever. Unfortunately, the nearest place to grab a drink is now the Saturnian moon Titan. No word from the Mayans yet on when that baby is due to go.