In this timezone, it’s the 21st of December
already, and the world has been destroyed.
Sorry guys, but the Mayans were right. At 12:01 am, Eastern Australian Daylight
time, this section of the world was destroyed.
The planet is disintegrating along the time-zone lines like the segments
of an orange getting peeled off and tossed into a juicer. Sorry folks, it’s all over. And they didn’t even use my method for
destroying the planet.
Fortunately, the super expensive Australian National
Broadband Network is extensive and robust enough to survive this catastrophe,
so I am still able to blog from the cosmic void. It is getting cold and hard to breathe out
here, but there are some benefits. For example, without a globe there is no global warming. And, in
space, no-one can hear your neighbor throw up in the front lawn after a big
night out. And the big night will last
forever. Unfortunately, the nearest
place to grab a drink is now the Saturnian moon Titan. No word from the Mayans yet on when that baby
is due to go.